Perspective: Steal My Show

A few weeks ago my kids and I had VEVO playing in the background while we did school at the dining room table. The music was upbeat, and helped to keep us focused.  We smiled at each other as we sang along.   It was very Brady Bunch like.

Then a song came on that we didn’t know, but we all were nodding our heads and tapping our feet, pencils, and fingers to it.

It was called “Steal My Show” by tobyMac.  The oldest asked if we could listen to it again.  She never asks for a repeat, so I tried to figure out how to get it to play again, but apparently I messed it up (that’s what the short guy told me.  “You messed it up, mom!  Now you can’t get it back ever!”).

 I grabbed my phone and googled the lyrics we could remember (HA! momma did get it back).  A video came up where Toby McKeehan (tobyMac) talked about what the song meant and how he explained it to his 5 year old son, Judah. 

I knew right then and there why that song came on, and why my daughter asked for a repeat, even though she didn’t know why.  God knew I needed this explanation.

You see, I’ve been struggling deeply with originality.  I know it’s from Satan, I know it’s meaningless, but I’ve still had these struggles. 

I met with my pastor over the summer and talked about some issues I was having.  He said something that forever changed my thinking. 

I have trouble delegating and tend to take on way more than I can handle.  He told me that my role isn’t MINE.  Even if my name is on it right now.   It ultimately belongs to God.  I may be filling that role for a short time, but it IS NOT MINE.  Say WHAAAAAT, Pastor Rod??  Because for real, I didn’t see it this way.  I am so appreciative that I do now though.

So I’m at peace there.

I first joined a mom’s only group about 7 years ago.  I quickly took on what I could handle, and then some (as usual).  We had trouble getting volunteers to host MOMS NIGHTS.  So I hosted them, month after month, after month, for years.  Occasionally we would have one somewhere else, or someone would offer to host one, but I mostly did it alone. 

Then when other people started hosting them, they were using the same ideas that I had, or played a role in helping to orchestrate.  Ornament exchanges, soup swaps, craft nights, that sort of thing (not like I made these ideas up myself, Google was my best friend during this pre-pinterest stage). 

I took it as these women were taking over these events and doing it better than I was.  I was offended and hurt, but couldn’t tell them that, because I didn’t want to be catty.  I felt saddened every time someone would talk about how great an event was that a friend put on.  I felt like when I did it, it wasn’t good enough.   I put so much effort into it and it hurt to feel like a failure. 

Jesus opened my eyes to see that’s not what they were doing.  They were really lifting a burden from my shoulders, taking it and making it their own (for now.  Remember it’s never really ours). 

I’ve blogged before about my frustrations with copycat pictures.  I’m letting go, or perhaps I’ve really already let go.  Yeah, I’m pretty free from that.

I consciously choose to take on an attitude of: Go ahead, steal my show.  For God’s glory only, I’ll sit back and watch you go.  If you’ve got something to say go on and take it away.

I know that through this I will see God glorified, and hope to see happiness bloom in everyone whose life touches mine.  I only wish I had adapted to this years ago.  I’m sure my husband, who listens so dearly and offers sound advice, wishes I had resolved this years ago too.  Bless his heart.  He puts up with more than most men, and keeps on lovin' me anyway. 

 

 

Wordless Wednesday: September 24th, 2014

When a Do-over Isn't an Option

 

Yesterday evening was pure chaos here.  I was upset we weren't gong to a party we were invited to because a home project didn't go as planned, and attitudes across the whole family were poor. 

Dang it, I was dressed, my make-up was perfect and my clothes looked goooood.

Everything was falling in place, well except my attitude and a front door that wouldn't close right.  But we could deal with those tomorrow.  Right?  I wanted to go have fun!

 

The constant bickering I occasionally complain about typical American siblings having, happened to my own children. My own children, folks!  These three are the best of friends.  My heart broke not knowing how to force them to get along with each other, and with ME!
There was back talk, fits thrown, yelling, pouting, and whining (oh the whining, it was horrendous).

 

Then at the very end of the day I couldn't take anymore. I.Just.Could.Not. 

 

I wanted to leave.. I wanted to walk right out the door and drive to the nearest Dairy Queen for a Georgia Mud Fudge and escape my grumpy reality.  That wasn't an option though, I knew they were closed.

I had failed to find the joy all day long.  I just flat out failed.

 

I thought, "I never want a repeat of this day".  I wouldn't rewind it and do it over even if I was given the chance.  It was THAT bad. 

Just then I remembered a friend saying "Be Still".  I heard her words echo loud in my imagination, "stop where you are and pray".

I did.  Deep breath.  I was instantly centered back to where I needed to be.  I hoped it wouldn't take long to get everyone else there too.
 

We prayed as a family, we talked together, all 5 of us.  Mr. Awesome and I explained compassion to our little people.  We Googled it for back up.  They believe us better when they hear the phone define a word.. Stinkers. 

 

Parenting Tip:

I'm actually serious here, well as serious as I can be. 

Use the voice option on Google and say "define {insert a word}".  Any word you can think of it will read the definition to you as well as display it on the screen.

 

They understood.  The kids asked for forgiveness. On their own, and I knew it was genuine.

Tears poured down everyone's checks (except dad's, but there was emotion there, he's just stronger than I in this current stage of life, praise God).
 
 

Friends,
I am begging you to find JOY. When you're upset, stop and pray.  Pray to be filled up over the top with joy.  Pray for your anger/sadness/frustration to pack its bags and go far away.  When you're heartbroken over your the actions of your kids, give them grace.  Forgive.  Forgiveness may be free, but it isn't cheap.  It's a beautiful gift.  It's a gift first given by our Heavenly Father.  I'm all about re-gifting. ;)
 

I love you.  Yes, YOU are loved.

Bless The Lord My Soul

Emotions have ran high the past couple weeks. 
I've prayed for the Lord to break my heart for what breaks His, and he has.

Along with that there's been real true deep heartache, and tears.  I've been in mourning and feel like crawling under the covers and staying there... but then the little people want food, and well, I do too.  Life must go on.

My desires this week come from lyrics.

My goals are:
To be rich in LOVE and slow to anger. I'm blessed with women who gently instructed me on this tonight. And for God's grace when I fall short. 

To be singing when the evening comes. At the end of the day I want to be singing praises for all the good that has happened, not indulging negatively in 'what could have been'.

To be alive AND well. There is a difference in living and living well.

For my joys to honor God.  I want what pleases me to also please Him.

Amazing Love.  To get it I must give it. I also can't beg for it to come from a place where it doesn't exist in the form I so desperately need.

I am not worthy of anything, yet God tells my everything He has is for me. 

His grace is enough to cover all I need.

Graze Box Update

I'm still loving Graze!  We are on our 8th box.  Thanks to all of you, I haven't had to pay full price for all my boxes.  But even so, they are a good deal for snacks delivered right to your door! 

I love the flapjacks.  Especially the brownie flapjacks. Oh my lucky tastebuds!  Who came up with this idea of putting brownie pieces in a rolled oat bar?  It's genius!

Through these snacks we are learning to try new foods. Some are simple things you would find at the grocery store, like peppered pistachios.  I just hadn't ever bought them before, but now I sure do!
Local Friends: Mills Fleet Farm carries these and many other nuts in 1# bags.

If you want to give Graze a try use my link to get your first and fifth boxes completely Free.  If you aren't a fan you can cancel anytime (even if all you get is the first free box).  I'd give one box a try though, you may kinda like it!
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https://www.graze.com/us/p/QUINCE5RU