Oil Pulling, For The Pretty Girl

Oil Pulling is crazy popular in the blogger world, but my real life friends don’t seem to have a clue what I’m talking about.  There are literally hundreds, (maybe thousands?) of posts on it all around the internet.  You can do a search if you want more details.  I’ll give you the basics from my perspective. ;)

 

First “The Why?”:

 Because you don’t really care about HOW, if you don’t know why, right?  At least you shouldn’t!  Be informed people!

• The biggest reason- It makes your teeth whiter!  I swear it! 
• Strengthens your teeth
• Tackles bad breath
• Improves overall oral health (I’ve got some cavities I’m hoping will cure themselves through this).

There are even more benefits besides what it can do for your oral health (like detoxing and that sort of thing).  I started doing it for cosmetic reasons.  I drink truck loads of coffee and tea, and that takes a toll on the color of my enamel.  It’s also supposed to help with liver issues, which I have my fair share of, and kidney issues.

• Another big bonus- 20 minutes of quiet time! I can think so much clearer when I keep my mouth shut for awhile!  (yeah, I just admitted that, didn’t I? Don't tell Mr. Awesome.  I've convinced him I work better when I'm running my mouth).

HOW: 

• Put 1-2 TBSP of organic coconut oil in your mouth and swish it for 20 minutes.  Timing is key here if you want the health benefits.  If you’re just going for the cosmetic effects, I bet 10 minutes would do ya just fine. 
•  SPIT IT OUT.  For the love of all things pretty and clean, DO NOT SWALLOW that load!  What started out as an innocent TBSP of coconut oil is now loaded up with nasty stuff that you don’t want going back into your body.  Yes, this is your resident germaphobe talking, but for real- It's so bad for you- just spit it out, okay?  Thanks!

 

Alright now that I’ve got you thinking about it, go out and do some research.  Then give it a try and let me know what you think!

I WISH I had a before and after picture to show you, but I promise the results are beautiful!

Slowing Down, Seeing More

It started early last week.  I told God I felt like I was drowning in my tasks and I couldn't take anymore.  Life wasn't enjoyable in that moment.  My calendar was full and my to-do list was far too long.  I told him things needed to slow down.  I was in pain, too busy, and needed a break.  Then I followed it up with, but please don't let anyone get sick, I've got too much work to do!
The next day... My little girl got a fever!  I was furious.  I really have no time for this, I told God.  It turned into being a bigger illness than I thought and I was forced to slow down.
Through this I felt guilty for not being able to keep up.  I was already falling behind and missing out on fun from having a sore back (roller skating incident that landed me on my tailbone). But now I couldn't just keep going because my baby needed me. 
After a few days the weight was lifted and God opened my eyes to what he wanted me to see. 
I've put pleasing everyone else first.  Everyone except my little family. 
This past week I've actually had time to enjoy life, even though it first seemed like a curse. And definitely has been tough taking care of a sick kiddo.
I've seen more.  I've taken more in than I usually do.  My kids are happier having mommy actually pay attention to them and play with them, vs just being here and working on my projects in the background of their playing.  My husband feels more validated when I can actually take a few minutes to look at him while we talk, rather than carrying on a conversation from another room while I get things done. The sex is better.  Everything is just better when you are forced to slow down.
It's my goal to realize sooner when I'm taking on too much.  To say no, without guilt {I'll learn}.  Just because I can do something, doesn't mean I have to {I've always felt the opposite, but I'm learning differently}.  With too many obligations I can't do any of them very well & that's not good for anyone.
Here are some pictures of this last week:

In The Kitchen: Homemade Peanut Butter

We stopped in for a visit with my dad (AKA Grandpa) over the weekend.  He sent us home with two baggies of peanuts.  One for the kids, one for their daddy. 
Well the kids and daddy put theirs together and here is what they made!

By the way, I am loving my $30 food processor from Amazon. Thank you to everyone who chimed in over on my facebook when I asked about them!  I didn't want anything too big & fancy yet, as I am admittedly a big of a kitchen utensils/supplies hog and am running out of room for all this stuff!
{& don't tell my husband, but I wasn't really sure how much I was going to actually use it}

In the past we have made our peanut butter with a mortar and pestle. That method works REALLY great and is surprisingly, therapeutically fun!  These days however, I just have no time for that.

Simple steps:
1. Dump Peanut Butter, Oil & Honey into the food processor. 
2. Turn it on and run it until you get to your desired creamy texture.  I didn't measure at all, I'm sorry.  Just go with your gut.  It's best to start with a little oil and add in more if needed.
3. ENJOY!

I stored the leftover in a mason jar in the fridge & put some into these little plastic containers for my husband to snack on at work.  Or more likely to be used as portion control for my late night PMS snacking. :) 

Self Care: No Fair!

The righteous God wisely considers the house of the wicked, overthrowing the wicked for their wickedness.  Prov. 21:12

“Life isn’t fair”

  I bet you can’t count how many times you’ve heard that before!  When our second child was a toddler I set the rules that my children were NOT allowed to say “NO FAIR!”.  It’s still a rule in this house today.  Seriously, they actually get punished for using this statement (They know the rules so it only slips out VERY rarely).  It drives me bonkers to hear other kids say this too.  Call me crazy but this little rule has really helped our children to get along better.  If they feel something isn’t fair, they have to find another way to express how they feel.  Saying “This isn’t even” doesn’t count as an appropriate replacement.  ;)

How about you?  Do you say “NO FAIR”?  Do you ever feel “NO FAIR”?  Perhaps you do, but I’ve gotta be honest with you, I think life IS FAIR!

It’s like this.  As a child we do feel like things aren’t fair.  Trust me, I know this.  I had two older brothers.  Both super smart, more athletic than I, and they had more friends.  Not only that, they were allowed to actually play with their friends more than I was!  I always felt like they were better than me and got more than me.  In my eyes, it wasn’t fair.  I spent a lot of time feeling that way.  What a waste.

As a child I didn’t take into account the fact that they were older so they were trusted for more outdoor play time or worthy of a bigger scoop of ice cream based on their age/size.  I just knew *I* was being ripped off and it WASN’T FAIR.

Well we don’t always think about the “Why”, do we?  Especially not when we’ve got high emotions mixed in. So often in response to our feeling of things being unfair someone fires back and confirms to us “LIFE ISN’T FAIR!”.

 

Ugh, that’s so not true.  I want to tell you something.  Lean in, I want you to listen closely, because this is important.

Life IS FAIR

 

At some point we grow up and we’ve got to let go of the mentality that life isn’t fair.  Not everything needs to be equal.  We don’t have the whole story, and that’s okay.  God does.  God shows up and He levels the playing field.  He’s does what is right and makes sure that things actually are fair.  Maybe not in the moment, but eventually.

In each circumstance we may not see the fairness, but if we ask, God will give us the eyes to see it.

Today you may feel ripped off, but tomorrow you may be greatly blessed.  Or it may be the other way around.

God rewards those that are worthy of a reward.  God’s ways are different than ours because he knows the whole story that we don’t know.

Sometimes our rewards are given to us here on Earth, other times our rewards are delivered to us in Heaven.

When you’re feeling like things aren’t fair ask God to show you the fairness.  It’s there.

BEAUTY: DIY Lip Gloss

Here is a quick how-to on making your own lip gloss.

We used:

Coconut oil

Younique pigments

You can also start with a chapstick base & add pigments.

Untitled, for now

It's Thursday morning, the alarm clock goes off and I'm far too tired and sore to even consider getting up... but I must, for the children.

By the time I get out of bed, and yell to them that it's time to get up, we've got a half hour.  Okay kids, eat, change, brush teeth, strap on shoes and get in the van!

We managed to do it and I even got them there with 5 minutes to spare.

The problem came when I just did not want to get out of the van.  There wasn't a close parking spot, my back was sore from a roller skating accident I had earlier this week and my brain was pounding from staying out late at a homeschool group meeting. 

I had all these excuses as to why I just couldn't take the kids in and I gave in to every.one.of.them. I dropped the kids off at the back door of the church and let the oldest deliver her brother to his room {at least I hope she did}.

I drove away filled with guilt. 

I came home and put a couple drops of something on my wrists, and a few drops of something else on my temples, sat down & put an ice pack on my back. 

 

My pet peeve during the school year is parents dropping their kids off at the back door of the church for Promiseland. I just have these memories of when I was a little girl & got dropped off at church.. I didn't really want to go, my parents were fighting, and my brothers never delivered me to my room, so I always had to walk in alone. It wasn't a good experience. I'm sure it wasn't like that every single time, but that's all that I can remember.

So I'm sitting here blogging this trying to get my guilt out. 
I'm working through my emotions/thoughts and realizing that probably a lot of parents who are dropping their kids off aren't doing it because they are fighting, or because they just don't care, are lazy, etc.  But maybe because they too are hurting, but in another way.

 

Are you hurting?  What would help ease the pain?

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Self Care: If I Have Not Compassion

As I clean out my MOPS bag for the year I run across some of my meeting notes. To toss or save?  {Hear me out, it's good stuff, but there are just so many papers!}

 In there, amongst the folded and crumpled papers,  a typed 1/3 sheet of wisdom and questions to ponder.  It's as if the speaker KNEW how deeply I needed the thoughts, and might not take the moment to take notes right then and there.  It's as if she knew I'd tuck it away in my bag and pull it out the very day I needed it most.  Okay maybe SHE didn't know all those things, but My God did.  He knew.

That gracious speaker shared a quote which I bolded below, but here is the whole shebang.  Read it, think about it, and find yourself blessed by the words and the emotions they cause.

If I Have Not Compassion

Amy Carmichael IF I HAVE NOT compassion on my fellowservant, even as my Lord had pity on me, then I know nothing of Calvary love. If I can easily discuss the shortcomings and the sins of any; if I can speak in a casual way even of a child's misdoings, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I can enjoy a joke at the expense of another; if I can in any way slight another in conversation, or even in thought, then I know nothing of Calvary love. If I can write an unkind letter, speak an unkind word, think an unkind thought without grief and shame, then I know nothing of Calvary love. If I am afraid to speak the truth, lest I lose affection, or lest the one concerned should say, "You do not understand," or because I fear to lose my reputation for kindness; if I put my own good name before the other's highest good, then I know nothing of Calvary love. If souls can suffer alongside, and I hardly know it, because the spirit of discernment is not in me, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I myself dominate myself, if my thoughts revolve around myself, if I am so occupied with myself I rarely have "a heart at leisure from itself," then I know nothing of Calvary love. If I cannot in honest happiness take the second place (or twentieth); if I cannot take the first without making a fuss about my unworthiness, then I know nothing of Calvary love. If I do not give a friend "the benefit of the doubt," but put the worst construction instead of the best on what is said or done, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If I take offense easily; if I am content to continue in a cool unfriendliness, though friendship be possible, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

If a sudden jar can cause me to speak an impatient, unloving word, then I know nothing of Calvary love. For a cup brimful of sweet water cannot spill even one drop of bitter water, however suddenly jolted.

If I say, "Yes, I forgive, but I cannot forget," as though the God, who twice a day washes all the sands on all the shores of all the world, could not wash such memories from my mind, then I know nothing of Calvary love.

How can you move towards the Lord's kindness so that you may show others LOVE, and not leave them tip toeing around you looking for a warning label? 

There is NO shame in admitting the truth. 

In The Kitchen: Homemade Hummus

Twice last week I ate meals with friends who brought hummus to share.  Mmm-mm-mmm.  Good food & good friends.  MY Fav.  I had made hummus a few years ago, then I kind of forgot about it. 

It isn't too expensive to buy, but I enjoy making things myself.  When I'm able.  But more honestly, when I feel like it! :)

 

 

Here's the ingredients I used based on the back of the package, and several other blog posts with recipes that I sorted through:

 

• One 15-ounce can chickpeas or garbanzo beans (I learned that these are the same thing, so find either one and you're good to go)
• 1/4 cup lemon juice
• 1/4 C. tahini (I found this at Fareway, it was $6.99, I am almost certain it has got to be cheaper somewhere else. This was the first time that I had actually seen it, so I bought it. It was next to the peanut butter . This makes sense because all it is is ground sesame seeds.  You could probably actually make your own if you had a good food processor and a whole bunch of sesame seeds, I had neither... hence the $7 I forked over)
• Garlic, I imagine whatever you have on hand will probably work. fresh or powder would be best.
• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• A dash of salt, or not.  I can't really remember if I put this in.
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cumin, or a full teaspoon if you got busy talking with your kiddos and didn't pay any attention to your recipe while you were scoopin' until after the second scoop.  Not that I would do that or anything... (But if you do, it still turns out just fine!)
• 2 to 3 tablespoons water
• A dash of paprika for pretty

I tried crushing it all up in my mortar and pestle, but that got old real quick, so I transferred it all to the blender and blended a little at a time while stirring until it was smooth.  I really need to get a food processer, but since I don't have one yet, this worked just fine.  I did all this with my little kitchen helper, the Fashionista.  She's 11 and LOVES all things cooking/baking/Suzy homemaker style.  Except cleaning her room.  Oh boy, that room.  I often wonder what her home will look like when she's older.  :/  Anyone else feel this worry? My mom probably felt the same way about me. 

In The Kitchen: Living Salad Bowl

Having a living salad bowl on my deck is just about my favorite thing right now.  It makes lunch time so easy!  It's also a great way to add simple veggies to dinner.  My biggest high comes from seeing my picky eater snacking on it while he plays outside. 
In each pot I planted:
Green leaf lettuce
Red leaf lettuce
Baby spinach
Green onions
I have another pot with basil (yummmmm) it has a plant in the center and seeds scattered around the rest that will hopefully grow soon.

After years of wanting to grow my own lettuce, I'm so glad I finally did it!

Self Care: Healing an Unpleasant Personality

"You are an extremely intimidating person and I can't make an appointment to be attacked..."

These were the words of a text message from a friend.  I denied it. I even fired back with "I am certainly not!..."

But then I calmed down, sort of.  I Googled it, because frankly I didn't know what it meant to be an intimidating person.  You know what I came up with?

Frighten?? ... make them do what one wants??  And check out those synonyms: frighten, menace, terrify, scare, terrorize, yeah I intentionally left COW off the list.

These are NOT good things, people!  And I couldn't help but wonder how long have I been coming off this way?  I still don't know, but from later messages I'm putting together that it's been at least a couple weeks and even MONTHS.

It's certainly not my intention to frighten anyone, and definitely not to get them to do what I want.  Not that I don't like having things my way,  I'll be honest, I really do.  But doesn't everyone?  Over the years I've learned to be quick to compromise on things that don't conflict with my moral beliefs.  I'll debate a little for the purpose of education, but not just to fight, and not just so I can be right.  I'm okay with picking my battles and sitting quiet through the others.  So this really surprised me.

I wanted to be sure I dealt with this negatively perceived personality trait I was apparently taking on before it damaged any more friendships or hurt any other relationships.
I could easily say it's just one person's opinion.  I could also say I don't need to transform to suit anyone else.  But the fact of the matter is, I deep down appreciated the honesty so I could fix the problem.

The morning after this all went down I checked in with my pastor about some discernment I'm having and brought this subject up too.  He loaned me a book that is really transforming me.

It's titled Speaking the Truth in Love.  That's actually what my intent was by wanting to get together with this friend in the first place.  It was not to correct her from a place of being better.  It was to lovingly say what I had observed in hopes of improving our friendship, our relationships with others and to also improve myself.  I didn't have a hidden agenda, unless you count getting some me time out without the kids.

In simply asking to get together for a heart-to-heart I unknowingly came across as harsh.  When I got corrected, I felt hurt and misunderstood.  The biggest problem I think was that we used social media and text message to communicate.  You just can't interpret someone's tone no matter how many emoji's and smiley faces are used.  I didn't want to communicate that way.  It really drives me crazy actually. 

I'm feeling really insecure through this.  I'm asking myself how many other people think I'm intimidating?  Lets get real, us simple folk don't use the word intimidating, we say witch. So how many people are calling me a witch behind my back?

I'm only a couple chapters into this book and it's good!  I've been reading a few pages every chance I get.  Here is what I've mentally highlighted:

*The word passive comes from a Latin word meaning to suffer.  A passive person’s actions say  I'll give up anything to avoid displeasure and gain approval. 

*Aggressive behavior says "I have the right to patronize you, put you down, dominate you, or humiliate you in order to get what I want."

I want to be a well-rounded balance of both slightly passive and slightly aggressive depending on the situation but overall I want to be assertive.

*"Christians are often tempted to say I forgive you prematurely, just to avoid the painful process of acknowledging and working through the problem and its consequences".

  I’d love to just say I forgive you and move on, but once I read this I realized that saying that isn’t going to fix this problem.  I am the problem.  Forgiving someone for misinterpreting my message and speaking the truth doesn’t fix the fact that I am perceived as a witch.  It’s just a bandaid to hide the hurt, and eventually we will be coming back to the same problem again. 

I'm looking forward to reading more from this book and transforming for God's glory through this process.  It's tough.  It's painful to tear back the layers and try to repair your own personality.  It down right sucks, really.

I'm keeping at it though because I feel God's gentle nudge to become the woman he wishes for me to be. To radiate kindness.
Inner self improvement is necessary and it does take work.  Work I'm willing to do.
My days here are numbered and I'm not going to let them slip by as I ignore the hard stuff because it's easier that way.  I knew from the time I was a toddler that my life wasn't meant to be easy.
My current motto is:
Without a struggle, I can't find my strength.
I'll let that thought carry me through.

Be honest with yourself.  What personality traits do you need to work on?